2025 year reflection ~ I wish you long life

It could have been a leadership article on brand building, self talk, confidence after comig back to work after mat leave, buildng confidence, finding a sponsor...but with the recent event in Sydney, my reflection will be very personal.

If I wrote this article last week, before sunday, 7pm, it would have been a different post, a different mindset, different reflection bits, different everything….I guess, it wasn’t meant to be written last week then.

My reflection of this year is about community, family, friendship, loved ones and prioritising what is really important at work and at home. Life is short, life is beautiful, life is a gift. Are you living your best life?

Since Sunday…. 7pm AEST… as we are based in Sydney and especially at 10pm, my heart and my brain got the confirmation of a fear I had deep inside, hoping I was done with deep pain that breaks you & grief.

One thing that many of you don't know about me is that I really do not like meeting new people, I don't like networking, it takes so much of my energy... it's insane. My introvert side fights it over and over again every time. So I always try to go with a wingwoman or a wingman BUT, this year, on 14th of April, I decided to go outside my confort zone and make a new friend, I texted her and said “our hubbies hang out every Thursdays together, our sons are friends, when you have less calls, you & I should do something”.

This was the start of a beautiful friendship, I have enjoyed all of our interactions, always laughing together, spending lots of time together at playdates just chatting about everything. She wrote a beautiful note to my 1 year old for his birthday… touching words...

A few months ago, I had a conversation with her about "community", telling her how interested I was in hearing more about the jewish community and what it is to have a community so powerful. I told her that being adopted, coloured, but growing up around white people only, it didn't really make me feel like I had one. When I meet black people they instantly think that I am part of their community and btw thank you BUT I know nothing about being part of the community I was born in, because life had other plans for me.

My mom’s best friend never believed that I wasn’t a fan of Britney Spears in the 90ties (sorry she’s too white & blond actually, I can’t even recognize myself in her but sure don’t believe me).

I told my husband before finding out the sexe of number 2, that if we ever had a girl and someone offered her a white barbie, they were going to have to return it to the store. (my words were actually not that kind but hey it's linkedIn).

In 2015, in London, my (2 black) colleagues asked me if my mom wore a wig, omg here goes the biggest misunderstanding. Depending on your skin color, you will understand us:

• My answer was “why would my mom wear a wig?”

• The looked at each other and said “well… she probably does, doesn’t she? she never changes her style?”

• I start getting confused... “my mom doesn’t have cancer... so she doesn’t no”

• They looked again at each other not understanding what was happening and then I looked at them wondering why they would ask me such an intrusive question - Then I remembered being a massive fan of “how to get away with murder and how the lead (black) character kept changing wigs… The dots conneced in my mind and I told them “omg … okay… you guys are black” (Yes, I seriously said that while being black myself)

• Then silence...they looked at each other and we all laughed “Marie what are you talking about”

• "Well I was raised by white people so I know nothing about what you guys grew up with. I’m the whitest black girl you’ll ever meet, like, I just learnt while watching "how to get away with murder" that I need to cover my hair at night so they stop breaking..." There's no book on how to be black when raised by caucasians...

This was such a funny misunderstanding.

Going back to 2025, to my conversation with my amazing friend, I told her that I didn’t really feel like I ever had a community like she does and how amazed I was that she is born in one like this. This was so foreign for me. She was so touched by my words, as she (I guess) didn’t think about "this" not being a thing.

Now reflecting on my year, while being back in Europe from May - August, I actually really felt the commuity, my childhood friends making time countless times for us, my friends that I don't catch-up with regulary taking days off saying "you guys made it all the way, we are taking the day off to be with you" etc , family adjusting their schedule, travelling to meet us, our friends hosting us even if they are not in the same country at the time... My community is scattered across the world but very present nonetheless, I feel like living so far away from so many of them, I sometimes forget that my community is different but very much present. I actually have such a strong community in Sydney too, my commuity is just different BUT Community...I SEE YOU.

Sunday 14th of December...

7pm ish - bad feeling even though we don’t know yet that it is an anti-semitic attack - so many of my friends live nearby...

7.40 pm - no answer to my 1st text

8pm - no answer to my 2nd text

10pm - another friend based in another country, helps me get the information that I was hoping not to hear … the reason why my friend isn’t texting me back...anger, worry, sense of loss even though there is still hope if we haven't heard anything publicly.

If like me, living in so many countries has been amazing, but meeting new people is exhausting, draining, even though you want that community, maybe reflect on what community you already have and if it's enough ? or what is not taking all your energy but helping you meet new people the right way for YOU ? in 2026, whatever it takes, I'm going back to Singing! My community is also there, I've been wanting to go back for so long, I cannot wait to meet you.

Negative self talk, I also see you...

While swimming at Wylie's bath on Monday, crying in the water, I reflected on my friend who has been seriously injured and I wondered "If I stopped meeting new people and expanding my network, then maybe I wouldn't be hurt like this ever again" - then thank god, I coached myself in the water and told myself that there are so many incredible people out there that I am meant to cross paths with and giving up in not the values I ever wanting to give to my kids or who I have been up to now. See you negative self talk, to quote Ed Sheeran, "You need man, I don't need you!"

So...I look forward to keep expanding my network and hopefully telling you that my friend has made a full recovery, at least physically.

With love... see you 2025! 2026 is full of hope. I wish YOU long life.

Wylie's bath in Sydney, thank you for all the reflection and healing of the soul in 2025...